Lucky damn woman!

I noticed I've been writing blogs only on things that irritate me. And even though I'm good at that and known for it I thought I should take a minute or five to point out why I am so fucking lucky! Every day I wake up and feel loved. I have someone by my side, someone who has been there through it and even though we've had our share of hardships we've still made it out to the other side. That in itself makes me pretty damn lucky. But wait there's more. I can then look the other way and see 2 beautiful children who think I am the world, they love me through my best and worst and never change. That unconditional love is amazing. It's an earth shattering feeling that I am blessed to experience. On top of that I have some of the best in-laws an extended family nearby. They're always there for us the best they can be, no matter what. To most that's more than enough but I get luckier. I got a whole family of my own, sadly they aren't close, but they love me. Have always loved me. Have never judged me and always always help me when I'm brave enough to ask. They are some of the best people I know. Anyone who knows them is blessed. With all that said, I struggle. Everyday I struggle. And then I struggle with the fact that I'm struggling bc I have all this amazing stuff. It's just I know this isn't where I'm supposed to be life wise. Not the kids and family. That's all good. But the school and financially and job wise. I've fallen and I've fallen hard. I've let it all slip into a mess I never intended. So I struggle. I struggle everyday with who I am and have become and who I'm meant to be. I get angry. I fight. I yell. I cry. I struggle. And then I wake up and hit repeat. But that's all any of us can do I suppose. Try try again. Find your happiness and strive and fight like hell to make it happen. That's what I'm trying to do. I'm fighting and I refuse to drown. I will get where I'm supposed to be and I have an amazing person to look up someone who didn't get hers until later in life as well. Someone who went back to school older than I am. And again just a few years ago to further get nursing degree. My mom. For that I'm thankful bc that gives me hope. That gives me motivation!

Facebook, schmacebook!

It's true, I have a facebook. And I do look at it, A. Lot.  I put up a lot of pictures and I constantly post quotes and/or status updates about life.  But I use it for only that because it's a helluva lot easier posting all that on there than sending my mom or my sister, or brother 1,000 texts/pictures a day.

Ok. That's a half lie. I do sometimes use it to vent, bitch, or complain about something going on in life...or on the occassion to make a not so subtle point. I'm good at that. Or so I like to think.


Really is it necessary to get on everyday and talk about your drama and all your personal dirty laundry.



Before I really dive into this I should fess up, I'm not perfect. I know SHOCKER! And I have my bad days and I have my days when I'm on the edge of sanity and there seems to be no way to turn back. I have my days when I whine and complain about inconsequential things, and some days about huge things that matter. But at the end of that day I go to sleep knowing I WILL change it tomorrow, or be doing my best to change it. I will NOT sit down the next day and complain about it all over again.

There are some things I really can't stand about Facebook and I wish I didn't have to start deleting and blocking people but that's how it's going to be. I've already started cutting people out of my chi in real life so I have to do it here as well. I need less drama, less anger, less retardedness!!! If this means I'm isolated from 90% of the people I know than so be it. I want to be happy and positive, for the most part, and I can't do this surrounded by all this craziness and drama. I NEED to be healthly and positive for LittleGirl and LittleBoy, I can't be caught up and sucking in all this negative energy.

With that said: I hate when people whine about life and how unfair it is and "why does this keep happening to me?"!!! Hello jackass, it keeps happening because you let it! EVERY ONE has a choice in life, I don't believe in laid out plans that don't change regardless of what you do, you and only you control your destiny. What happnes the next day and the next and the next is YOUR CHOICE! Stop sitting there whining about it and get up and do something. (Obviously this doesn't apply to those who are legitimately doing something and just need a vent or two, so unbunch your panties). This is for those who complain about the same thing everyday and do nothing to fix it. So get up and make a choice, you can either sit there cry and say why me and do nothing and keep seeing the same results, or you can get off your ass and do what you need to fix it. The choice is yours. If you are doing something and keep seeing the same things than you're doing something wrong, or you're life really is a circle of shit and i'm sorry!

I can't stand when people do the whole "copy & paste" status updates. I'm sorry but I just don't like them. I get you wanna spread some message and you think it's really a great way to do it. But truth is it's stupid. If you really wanna say something and wanna make a statement, than USE YOUR WORDS! If you're trying to honor someone by doing a copy & paste, don't, do them a real honor and speak from your heart. For this one thing I do feel bad if I offend you, but I'm a believer in the power of words and feel strongly about using your own. (I don't mind an occasion status share) I'm talking about the ones that say copy & paste if you agree. Really!? Because if I agree then I'd have already said it, or I will find my own way to say it.

Leave the dirty personal business/laundry where it belongs, at your home. The business with your baby's momma/dadda, or wife, or lover and what shannigans they are pulling is YOUR business and should stay that way. Bashing them on facebook thinking you are "strong" or "cool" makes you  look like the real jackass, especially when 90% of the time they can't even see it because they aren't on your friends list, or are blocked. Why do you want the whole world reading about your drama and what bullshit you are doing or putting up with?

Raving about how much you drank or how hungover you are the next day...is NOT cool. Most of you are in your late 20s early 30s...unless you're on Jersey Shore being paid (still not cool) to be a loser going to the clubs, picking up guys/girls, partying all night, taking shots repeatedly, it's nothing to brag about and shouldn't be done. Creepers. Going out constantly and not being home with your kids is also not respectable, just saying. (I believe we all need time out and away but get a grip!)

If you say you're done with a certain place and/or scene than be done, don't post a month later how you were there and it's still drama! Hello, duh, things don't change when it's the same people still there. What did you expect?

I have a lot of respect for stay at home PARENTS, I do... truly. It's hard work. However I do NOT appreciate hearing how tired you are, and how sad it is b/c you get to spend the whole day with your kids and maybe running errands, or having to clean. SERIOUSLY THE WHOLE DAY! Try squeezing that all  into 1-2 hours than tell me how it feels. And really poor you, you get to watch your kids every day grow and learn. Through the week, I see LittleGirl for 30min each morning, God willing we aren't both tired and screaming, and that's it, because most nights by the time I get home from work she's sleeping. Don't get me wrong I like working and having that time out, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't love having more time and energy with/for the kids. So I try not to complain about it, even though it's a more legitimate complaint than when you get to see them ALL FLIPPIN' day!

And PLEASE for all that's holy, stop getting on facebook everyday saying "i'm tired, blah blah blah, I see a nap in my future" "I'm going to take a nap!' SHUT YOUR FACE! A nap, you get to take a nap and you wanna tell me you're tired, shut up for reals. I'm sorry you're tired and have to run errands. That you could've done yesterday or tomorrow or the next day b/c you are HOME everyday. God forbid! (I especially hate this if you have no kids, or if  it's due to the aforementioned partying)

Ok, that's enough I don't want to sit here all day and complain. Then I'd be doing exactly what I'm bitching about :)



A little kitchen help - Recipes!!

I've been lazy on my blog. I realize this. There's been some page views so I suppose someone is curious about what goes on over here. I still have tons in my head I wanted to discuss. Some of it is down right deep and I need peace and time to write it all out. Both of which I rarely receive in this crazy-beautiful life of mine.

Today I decided to share 2 quick and easy soup recipes. They make for a nice meal especially if you don't want to spend lot of time, or make a big mess, cooking.
The first one I received from a friends family so I hate sharing it, but it's soooo yummy I just couldn't resist.

Crab Soup
3 tbsp of chopped onion
1 garlic - minced (or garlic salt if you are in a real hurry, about 1/2 tbsp)
1/4 c. butter
1/4 tsp Worcestershire sauce
1/4 c. flour
1/2 tsp salt
2 1/2 c. of Half & Half
2 c of Tomato Juice
2 cans of crab meat
sour cream

1. Saute onion & garlic in the butter until onion is tender
2. Stir in flour, salt/pepper until bubbly
3. Add Half & Half, tomato juice, and Wor. sauce
4. Add crab meat and heat thoroughly

Chicken Tortilla Soup
(this one calls for making your own tortilla strips, if you are in a hurry you can buy the strips and sip the making them) Also this will yield 4 servings, tweak to get desired amount if necessary.
4 (6in) corn tortillas
1/2 c. chopped onion
3 boneless, skinless chicken breast halves (12 oz of chicken)
1 garlic clove pressed
1/4 tsp chili powder
1/4 tsp ground cumin
2 cans (14.5 oz each) chicken broth
1 can (14.5 oz) diced tomatoes, undrained (if you have the time you can by tomatoes and dice and season)
1 can (4oz) chopped green chilies, undrained
4 tsp snipped cilantro
1/2 c cheddar cheese
4 thick slices of lime (if you want, I leave this out b/c I don't like limes)

1. (if you are making tortilla strips) Preheat oven too 400. Cut tortillas in 1/2 in strips, place on baking stone, or cookie sheet. Bake 7-8 min or until crisp
2. While that's baking, chop onion. cut chicken into 1/2 in pieces. Cook and stir chicken for 3 min. Add onion, garlic, chili powder, and cumin. Cook and stir 2 min. Stir in broth and tomatoes and chilies. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer for 10min.
3. Put tortilla strips in bowl and ladle soup over it. Garnish with cilantro, and cheese. (this is where you'd squeeze in lime juice if desired)



Enjoy!!!